Ted Haggard, President of All Evangelicals (I'm not sure why they just didn't come out and call him Duh King) doesn't quite come all the way out of the closet, but almost. You see, along with the most brutal drugs, he just wanted a deep massage from a handsome man found on the Internet. That ain't so bad, is it? His lover claims they've had a three-year relationship, whereas Ted claim he never had the sex, and never snorted the drugs. He was just . . . "tempted."
Poor Ted, he's pacing the floor at this very moment (after abdicating the Evangelical Throne and quitting his post as Chief Shepherd at the New Age Life Church in Colorado Springs), worried about his dark secret. His dark, gay secret. And poor Ted had been so vocal against homosexuals. He hated most what was in himself. But what poor Ted doesn't quite grasp in understanding, is that it was not his passion for masculine men that is and was his greatest sin. His sin boils down to his penchant for lying to people, for teaching them falsehood, for Word-Faith gibberish, for standing out there a hypocrite, lifting his hands
"before God" (what god, we wonder?), all the while lying, living a lie. Everyone already knew he was a complete false prophet, in that he made all kinds of predictions for the war in Iraq that never panned out, the immediate capture of the #1 terrorist, and when called upon his false prophecy, instead of confessing his status as false prophet, he instead claimed: "Well, I guess that there God went ahead and changed His mind, I shore enough don't be knowin' why!" Despite the fact that the Bible claims that God doesn't change His mind, and that "prophets" who are wrong in their prophecies are FALSE prophets (no middle ground of "prophet in training," or green-belt prophet).
He should just confess, and his whole life would change. He wouldn't have to live as the perpetually foolish Younger Brother. He wouldn't have to sweat in the darkness, fully expecting to be discovered at any next moment.
He could become a real shepherd, without all the nonsense. Without all the falsehood. The lies, and the worship of the father of lies.
Poor Ted, he's pacing the floor at this very moment (after abdicating the Evangelical Throne and quitting his post as Chief Shepherd at the New Age Life Church in Colorado Springs), worried about his dark secret. His dark, gay secret. And poor Ted had been so vocal against homosexuals. He hated most what was in himself. But what poor Ted doesn't quite grasp in understanding, is that it was not his passion for masculine men that is and was his greatest sin. His sin boils down to his penchant for lying to people, for teaching them falsehood, for Word-Faith gibberish, for standing out there a hypocrite, lifting his hands